Thursday, November 10, 2011

so, moves on~

it's been awhile and life has moved's begun for some in my family...autumn leaves are falling...the art studio evolves into a new look, refreshed but still embracing the old charm of the 100+ years it's been here.  i am fortunate to be a part of helping to create this space and am ever grateful for the people who have helped bring it this far...of late, the doors, block windows and new finish to the sheet-rocked walls add a really wonderful touch along with the trim around all the doors & windows--lovely with their hemlock frames!  soon, i'll be able to move my art supplies, easel, tables & shelves into the space and set create & see what evolves!  i can hardly wait-- this has been awhile coming and it's shaped up so wonderfully with just a few final things yet to do...

otherwise,  leaves are being raked & music is playing--and changing with the seasons.  at this house, often, holiday music begins before the neighbors might...but i've always thought that if i don't begin early, time moves so quickly, i'll miss the whole experience and i love the process!  college apps are being filled out with an 18th birthday soon here--amazing that the years have flown from a scary now!  what a delight to be a part of all the adventures of life--who knows what's next?  i've had the opportunity to go away--to visit family in california, helping move from one house to another and watch the home unfold in the new locale...go off in other directions to visit, help & spend time with family and friends who live afar...i am honored to be included~ 

for this season which is upon us, i give thanks...while i love the season of thanksgiving and all it includes, i think, often, of how grateful i am each day--for the little moments, the big surprises, the challenges & the joys...for all of this & more, i am grateful~

...'being' is enough

somedays, 'being' is all there is...and yet, believe it or not, 'being' is an active participation of life. for me, 'being,' is about participating--a presence and active & integral reality of active living...not just floating through life in a haze.  today, i've been touched by a dear friend's loss yet again...and reminded, too, of how important the active participation in life is for each of us.  what a privilege it is to be our best selves through the active 'being' with our journey.  each one of us can choose how that's going to look--no, we cannot make all things difficult flee...but really, the presence of challenge in our lives is what sometimes gives perspective and added beauty to the rest of our life.  so, back to the thought about choosing...

how we face 'what is' speaks volumes about who we are.  we can make the difficult be the focus...or it can be what gives other parts of life perspective...teaching us lessons, reminding us of something-- the potential of life...and multitudes of other things; however, as life is full of joy & challenge, we can choose how we're going to respond to all of that -- will we allow the challenge and difficulty to be the powerful directive of who we are, define us if you will or will we see all things as a part of the whole journey and thereby, simply that--a part and not what has to drive our lives.  i love that each of us have a choice about our lives--if not each and every actual happening, rather, the ultimate choice--what am I going to do about with what comes my way--how am i choosing to respond to life?  that is MY choice and 'being' is enough~

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

basil, tomatoes...and...anything!

the garden is beginning to be fruitful...i found 2 small lemon cucumbers yesterday, have had a handful of lovely golden cherry tomatoes and basil, cilantro & rosemary for awhile now.  i can hardly wait to have enough tomatoes to make something i care what?!  not at all...something lovely with balsamic vinegar, salt & pepper...some lovely cheese.  incredible fresh flavors that cannot come too soon! for me, LeaningIntoLife means being present for what is...available to smell, taste, hear, touch, sense, love~  life if full and vigorous, warm and languid--feeling pain and sadness when one loses someone close...delighted with the joy of love and connection...embracing new and upcoming adventures. today is full and i am grateful for it!  someone is off hiking and enjoying time away in the quiet of the mountains, bicycle rides are available for those who choose to ride, enjoying the blowing hair, breezes which cool on warm and even hot summer days...feeling strength as one stretches beyond the normal activity...someone trying a new recipe or art form...making plans to see missed dear ones or meeting someone new that you know can be a friend--lovely! 

really, what are you grateful for today?

Saturday, July 16, 2011

each moment we're learning or teaching...

recently, i've been reminded of how we are learning and teaching always--often simultaneously...and what that says about life.  pure observation can bring one to some conclusions and simply put, that's how some of these new ideas have evolved.  recently, watching people give and give with one person taking the credit for the whole project has brought me to wonder about my role in the learning/teaching when this sort of thing happens whether or not i'm on the receiving end of that situation or simply observing it.  i tend to think all our lives are lived within the constraint of learning and  growing from what occurs; however, one of my sons mentioned recently that perhaps i am the teacher rather than supposed to learn something and this gave me pause.  although as a social worker for many years, i've frequently shared my thoughts and perspectives when counseling from a 'devil's advocate' position and certainly framed with words like, "have you considered this possibility" or "something to consider might be..." thus leaving the receiver the decision to choose which to consider and move is, after all, not mine to choose when it's not my life.  hence, the teaching piece of my life has been in my counseling or as a parent...but in a bigger perspective--a life path, if you will, teaching and learning is in every moment of each of our lives. even when we don't seek to be an example or a teacher, we often are.  am i called to speak up or at least encourage the person to find voice in their paths when i've observed something i, by silence, acquiesing and participating in some form of injustice?  when and how do i know the lessons to be learned or the teaching to be shared? maybe the lesson is this:  sometimes what's most clarifying about our character is what we don't say--sometimes it's what we do...and being open to when to do which is the challenge as well~

this brings me to the thoughts of leaning into life, embracing that role, intentionally choosing to BE present with life and all that might bring one's way.  we've had a sadness this week and truly, what's to learn in this has not crossed my mind...being mindful with the experience and honoring the loss of our sweet little friend is the focus...caring for and supporting those closest to her is the most prevelant feeling within i learning or teaching in this?  probably so, but when one lives a life of honest presence, each moment brings something to learn, noted or not, and something to teach as well.  i am grateful for feeling deeply and with that, feeling deeply the loss.  without the depth of connection, i will not feel the depth of loss...and i will not have learned what was intended in that experience.  much rather to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all. (Tennyson, paraphrase intended). 

Monday, June 27, 2011

monday, monday...

after a busy weekend full of gardening, being with people i love, lightening the load of 'stuff' in my world...yes, it was a busy but good weekend.  now monday--new roof time for the art studio--yeah!!  the electricity is waiting to be completed following the roof's completion and the addition of two new skylights...the loft is in the midst of completion but with debris falling all around, it, too, is on hold for the moment.  warehouse lights are on their way to their new home in an art studio...a new faucet is here with amazing instant hot on one handle and cold on the other sharing a faucet!  i didn't even know one could get an instant hot that looked like this much less combining the cold with so one doesn't get burned when washing up...i am 'seeing' how it'll be when its completed... i am so pleased with the way it's coming together and ever so grateful for the very skilled people who have helped create this--such great determination to make Louise the very best she can be (for those of you who missed the blog where 'she' got named, a couple of blogs back that happened...still am not sure why Louise but that's her name...). 

at the present time, the one thing that continues to haunt me is the wall board search...i'd been determined to not use sheetrock, but alas!  any other has its own set of cons as well...still seeking a 'green' option of there any located nearer than Portland, OR -- i don't know, but perhaps i need to make a road trip to Portland...could be really fun!   ideas are welcomed~ 

small areas around my yard continue to call me as the dust settles every now and, pockets of peacefulness and beauty are continuing to energize me, create a place of BEing for even brief the flowers and even the newest collection in the wall-pockets i created based on pictures of others' ways of having growth on walls...hence, this little display of succulents.
taking time to find peace within on this path of life is a gift--wishing it on to each one...

Thursday, June 23, 2011

today i choose intention

i've been reminded, lately, again, of how little i control...yes, i know, that's something i run from...being controlled, but of course, being on the other end of it, sometimes works really in health issues...building projects...and even on occasion, life!  of late, someone dear, one of my 3sons, has had some ongoing health concerns and wow!  what a reminder of being out of control...this mama doesn't always do well with that one when it has anything to do with her sons no matter what their age!  amazing how much that "mama tiger" wants to come out and be present and active--certainly not just standing by, mind you!  nevertheless, i consciously seek to live with intention--to live fully, actively and peacefully, all at one time--for me, that is intentional living.  being present, paying attention, listening to that internal nudge and acting on it intentionally.  that can mean loving, watching, supporting and lovingly, letting others do what they need to because it is their life and that's how i choose to love and live with intention too. 

when i was young, i often felt over-protected, sheltered & controlled, if you will, by the parental units.  now, mind you, i also know the best of intention was behind all of this; nevertheless, as i grew and became more who i was, i needed the freedom to explore, try and find my such, as a parent later on, i have chosen to seek that sort of parenting with my own children and certainly, at their ages now, i so appreciate the relationship we've grown of loving trust between son/mother as well as a special friendship.  i am rich with appreciation for this gift in my life and grateful for the awareness of its presence. 
                                          today...i, again, choose intention~

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."
 Mahatma Gandhi

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

what a wonderful day of discovery...! is full and busy with another successful inspection on the art studio named Louise--a wonderful name that still makes me smile!  i'm seeking lights for my new space...have spent time looking at warehouse/barn lights with large galvanized shades...seems to be just the right touch for the space which is unfolding.  today we got the treated lumber to enclose the 18" space we created by digging, digging, digging for a crawl space considered code-worthy.  it would provide space for many creatures--those i don't want as well, so enclosing with ventilation is the next step.  all this practical stuff is needed and i love how it's being created by K...amazing work!  after all the bumbling to get started with this project, i have a huge sense of peace knowing i  have someone of such quality and ability creating this place of creativity and joy. so, my job is to make sure the other pieces are ready and in place to continue the process as seamlessly as possible...electric install next and insulation following.  after that, it may be a bit until the next phase happens as K tends to prior commitments with his fence-building business. 

with sun shining, the atmosphere and warmth are just right for creating & gardening...after our rain and cooler weather, it might take abit for us to feel too warm, but my garden is smiling--in fact, i have small green pear tomatoes!  weirdly enough, i also have a blossom on an eggplant from last that came through the winter, i don't know, but it's a strange & wonderful serendipity!  i'm loving gardening again this year--always something new to see, discover, move, weed, trim and dead-head!  i am always moved by the process of how some dirt, sunshine, water and seeds along with special energy create this amazing color in life...lovely indeed!  i am so grateful to be a part of it~

Friday, June 10, 2011

...friday already?!

well...amazingly, the days fly by and sometimes, one can get caught up in moments spent doing intentional things without thought...or letting hours pass as i am looking for old/new siding for my studio get the idea, i'm sure.  yes, it's been a week of seeking and no, i'm not referring to wanting more than i have because i am really very content and grateful with the 'haves' in my life.  however, as a recent new acquaintence put it, the search is much of the joy in the in reclaimed lumber & architectural beauties such as a lovely unique sconce...
so, the studio keeps unfolding...and She,  (yes, she) seems to have been given a name by K...somehow i need to incorporate said name into the future too...louise?  really?  we'll see, but for now, i smile when i hear her being called by name.  as for the practical pieces of where 'she's' at, here's a couple of photos...

after lots of conversation with various people including my 3 sons. ideas & energy say i'm excited and anticipating a wonderful space is a vast understatement.  the electrician and i just had more conversation as i've clarified my vision, so...a few revisions to the original overview.  the intention of this space remains true...a place for creating, being, breathing, engaging and embracing life...leaning into life...with intention!
                                        Breathe in the moments...fellow adventurers~

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

another day...another post~ has continued to happen and in ways, unexpected...but then again, that's being in the now, isn't it?  so, the studio continues to unfold.  a few snags with the inspector, which interestingly enough, upon his first visit, mentioned he'd not ever seen a restoration done this way...usually, people lift an old building up and place it down upon poured pad.  not this one, though!  K has done an admirable & high-quality job replacing some of those old posts which were slowly (did i mention this building is 100+ yrs old?!) deteriorating...alas! don't we all need  a little lifting up and supporting every now and again getting to 100 yrs?!  yes, indeed, but with support beams and posts replaced with deep posts and concrete, 18 " of soil excavated from underneath to create a good clearance (and make the inspector happy) and soon a vapor barrier down...we're on our way.  while a bit of an adjustment, without installed heat would allow for no needed insulation in the floor, i think i'll choose to add some for comfort and longevity...after, those amazing, old 2x10's will be placed down for 'sub-floor' with some comfortable and workable finished floor--perhaps some of those wonderful, to follow...

over the past days, some of the twists and turns have included some health, now off to see how M is doing with his growing healthier...watching a 'child' no matter the age, with pain, is ever so much harder than carrying that pain is returning though and i am ever so grateful~  being in the now, embracing what is, challenging and wonderful...all a part of living life and worth it!  here's to life, lived deeply.

Friday, May 20, 2011

in the beginning...

so...i've thought of beginning a blog for awhile now and yet...time passes, life goes forth, i embrace what i can in the most intentional way.  how does one embrace life in an intentional way?  for me, i like to stay with whatever it is i'm thinking, working at, creating or being with...and yet, of course, as with all of us, the mind wanders, so intentional every moment i am not! 

one might ask why now am i beginning this blog?  well, a dream of mine, one i've been considering, creating drawings of, rethinking and seeking new-to-me items to help create--a place of creative's begun, just a few weeks back now really!  and i've got photos, yes, real, true photos of this evolutionary process!  my beautiful, old 100+yr old carriage house garage is becoming my art studio...well, at this point, it's hard to tell, but the foundation is being worked into something lovely, true, perhaps even level and with all the goodness of a quality craftsperson creating it...several people are instrumental in getting me this far...K, the creative genius who's chosen to take this project on; R, my patient, caring spouse who has turned his energy to dirt-removal for the better part of several days as well as C, my son, who has also moved dirt and incredibly is spared some of this challenge by having many projects of his own but who truly wants me to have this dream come true. thank you each...i am rich~